With God..............I can do it all!!!

I know it's been a long time but I am glad to say God has brought us through it all. My lovely husband, my gift form God, has been by my side as I climbed the mountains I faced and the valleys I've forged through. I've been able to see a neurologist and gotten a perspective of where I am going with what's happening to me. I watched the relief on Glenn's face as we were sitting in the office. I also saw the brimming tears that he tried to hide from me. I know they were a sign if pure joy because God had answered our prayers, as always. Now we can move ahead with fulfilling more dreams and embarking on more adventures. We cannot wait!!!! 

God is REAL!!!

It has been a long, long, time and this quest for understanding what it happening to me looks like it's finally coming to an end. For the last six or seven years, depending on who you ask, I feel like I've been living with a dirty secret. I became aware of my seizures after my father's death. Everyone, including me and my family, attributed it to the stress of this event. Then it became the fact that I was missing him and refusing to 'let him go', so to speak. It has cost me jobs and dreams. I love to teach and my favorite age group is pre-k to fourth grade. I love sitting on the floor and teaching through play and just seeing the light of understanding in their eyes. I got my first teaching job while I was doing my internship at Brookhaven College. They hired me in the middle of my class and I ended up working there for two years. After graduation I got another job at Kids R Kids but was 'let go' because I supposedly did not 'fit in' with the other teachers. I knew it was simply because of the seizure I had in the classroom and now could not be left alone with the kids. That nearly destroyed my spirit and determination. I applied for another position at Primrose School and got it. Once again the seizure reared it's ugly head, not once but twice. The second time was outside in front of all the parents waiting to pick up their children. I was immediately informed that I wasn't safe for the children. I had thoughts of just curling up and letting the worst happen to me because I was officially a failure. Through it all God, my family, my indestructible mother and my husband, a gift from God, stood by me and urged me to go on. I was unemployed for three months before I started working at Lowe's and have been there for a year. I don't know what to say except that GOD IS REAL!!!!!! I don't care what people say or think it is true. I've had three seizures in the last two months alone and am still working there. On Thursday August 30th I have an appointment so see a neurologist. I cannot explain the relief for both me and my army of people. We will finally know what is causing all these problems and my husband and I will start on a whole new project. All I can ask for is more prayer because I know it works. It has till now and it will continue to work in spite of everything.

I AM THANKFUL FOR.......

Wow, it's been a while. A lot of things have happened but one thing has been constant: God is still God and I am happy. This month has been a test of my faith and everything that comes with it. I had a slight episode at work and people thought I was just being my silly self. I need to learn to take care of myself first in order to be able to take care of others. I have a habit of not knowing when to say 'no'. I am an overachiever in every sense of the word. This morning a loud noise woke me up and before I knew it I was running down the stairs to take care of a neighbor whose car had flown over the embankment and ran into another apartment. The things that have to happen to make people call on God is just sad. She was worried about how much things were going to cost.

• I am thankful that no one was hurt. 
• I am thankful for the way this week ended
• I am thankful that I still have a job to go to 
• I am thankful that I have so many people watching to make sure that I am alright
• I am thankful for still being in love with my husband
• I am thankful that I can still laugh in the midst of all the insanity

My favorite song is THE PRAYER and I have a collection of several artists singing it. It's even amazing when you stop and listen to the words. It's about our everyday goings and comings and how we should simply just ask God to direct us. There is no need for a formatted prayer, just talk to Him as if He were sitting right next to you on a park bench.

 Lyrics to The Prayer :
I pray you'll be our eyes,
and watch us where we go
And help us to be wise,
in times when we don't know
Let this be our prayer,
when we lose our way
Lead us to the place,
guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe.
La luce che tu dai
I pray we'll find your light
Nel cuore resterà
And hold it in our hearts
A ricordarci che
When stars go out each night
L'eterna stella sei
Nella mia preghiera
Let this be our prayer
Quanta fede c'è
When shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place
Guide us with your grace

Give us faith so we'll be safe 

 Sognamo un mondo senza più violenza
Un mondo di giustizia e di speranza
Ognuno dia la mano al suo vicino
Simbolo di pace e di fraternità

La forza che ci dia
We ask that life be kind
È il desiderio che
And watch us from above
Ognuno trovi amor
We hope each soul will find
Intorno e dentro a sè
Another soul to love
Let this be our prayer
Let this be our prayer
Just like every child
Just like every child

Need to find a place,
guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
E la fede che
Hai acceso in noi
Sento che ci salverà

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!!!

So, it finally happened. I am another year older and I don't even know what to say except that this is the happiest I have been in a long time. I was sitting around taking a good look at where I've come from and where I am now. Let's see I have lived through traveling around with my family and the ultimate pleasure of coming in contact with some of the most amazing people. I have lived through tragedy and fear. I have also lived through failure and barely escaping death, not once but five times. No one gets that many chances. Through it all there has been a constant hand guiding me, GOD!!!!!!!!!! Need I say more? I have also accomplished one of the most amazing things in my life. I fell in love with the perfect man. I cannot ask for anything more. All I can say is THANK YOU GOD FOR EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!

The Things You Miss........

This past weekend we went to my brother's graduation in Houston, TX. I was so proud as I watched the little boy who used to eat his lunch before he made it to school walk on the stage among his peers to graduate with a JD. I also watched the look on my mother's face and I could see how proud she was and hear her take that great, big, breathe. My mother is one amazing woman who has been our rock through everything we three have lived through. I look at her and it's a constant reminder of who I can be. This woman has lived through a lot and yet the people who see her think otherwise. I sometimes watch the way my husband is quick to get near her. When we go to the grocery store, the question on his mind is "does your Mom like this?". If I am in a room with them, it's almost as if I have melted into thin air. When he sees my nephew, the world ceases to exist. This Man is teaching me to be the best Wife that my Mother taught me to be.

I'M STILL LAUGHING!

Wow, it has been a long time since I have written anything. Let's see, a lot has taken place but the best part of it is I'm still laughing. I am still learning how to be 'a good wife'. I have learned that the key is patience and never going to bed upset. So I have decided to throw in a little "domestic" training to see how things will go. I started with the dishwasher and I quickly discovered that I have to post a not stating when it's time to put the clean dishes away in order to free the dishwasher. I then moved to making meals when I'm at work and he's at home. The first time I took before and after pictures of the kitchen (but I should have taken before and after pictures of my face). The food turned out amazing but I had to pray for my kitchen. I decided to make things easy and leave a list of what the main meal should consist of in-terms of what protein to use and gave him the opportunity to come up with the sides. I am just not brave enough to add the laundry to the list yet, but I am sure one of these days I'll be able to do so. Through it all though, we have been laughing at how funny it is to see the way I am having to let go of doing everything my way and letting him have a role in "taking care of" our home. I love the look in his eyes when I tell him I have some projects for him to do. I can never wait to see the end results every time. I know I'm spoiled rotten by this man but God I love him. He makes my heart laugh even when he's trying to be difficult. I cannot wait for the next 100 years because I'm going to still be laughing.

THE GIFT OF LIFE.

Today is my husband, Tory Glenn 'Kwame' Bussey,s birthday. It's an amazing thing when one adds another year to their life and realize that God has brought them this far and is not going to leave them on the rest of the journey. Yesterday on the way home he started talking about all the things that have made him strong, the good and the bad. I watched the look on his face and realized this man is one of the most prized possession I have. Unlike some men who consider showing emotions 'unmanly', he has no problem showing how he feels. This is the man who cries at the movies when it calls for it. I am thankful to God for letting me be a part of one of his great creations. They don't make them like this anymore.

....THANK YOU GOD!!!!

So I know it's been a while since I wrote anything but it has been absolutely fantastic to witness the changes that are taking place. First of all, it started with our home. I never understood why men are so opposed to making changes in the home until I had to do the same. I have been asking to change some of the things in our kitchen for over 3 years now. I mean I know it's just the two of us but sometimes we need to treat ourselves to something nice. In order to get what I want, I decided to make a bet and with each win came money (of course I was going to get what I want anyway right). It was so much fun when the time came for my sweetie pie to pay up. He really thought I was kidding when I asked for cold, hard, cash. When we went shopping I think he had as much fun as I did. I was actually surprised that he took interest in refurnishing our kitchen. I have watched him cook and clean with all the stuff we got and how he takes much better care of them now. Next on the list is the one thing everyone has been asking us for, a baby. We want to make that happen but first we need to make sure that we are fully ready for the responsibility that comes with it; physically, emotionally and financially. I have watched him with other children and he is amazing and tender. I have watched how he plays with my nephew whenever they get together and I know he is going to be the best father ever. I know God is going to bless us with everything we need to raise a great family and I am looking forward to that part of this journey that we are on.

Beautiful People!

When God made man, He took a good look at him and decided to give him something pretty by making woman. Then God decided to make more people in different shades and sizes. People were, and still are, so ignorant that they separated them into two major groups: black and white. I believe that God took a look at the division and decided to give the so-called 'inferior' beings something else. He made black men so beautiful that every woman wanted and still wants one. I find it sad that when I look around me I see some of these beautiful men working hard to reach the top and yet the ones who were given another opportunity just wasting it. It just hurts me to see these 'brothers' channelling all their assets into one direction. The select few that have decided to lift themselves up keep looking back and hoping that the younger ones will follow in their example. I work with some amazing men, both black and white. They have been to places only one can dream of and have some awesome stories to tell. There is one who's father was a mathematician and anothers was a scientist. Wow, what an amzing life they have had. I wish there was some way to shine the light on things like that to make all men, black and white, aware of their capabilities.