Monday, August 27, 2012
God is REAL!!!
It has been a long, long, time and this quest for understanding what it happening to me looks like it's finally coming to an end. For the last six or seven years, depending on who you ask, I feel like I've been living with a dirty secret. I became aware of my seizures after my father's death. Everyone, including me and my family, attributed it to the stress of this event. Then it became the fact that I was missing him and refusing to 'let him go', so to speak. It has cost me jobs and dreams. I love to teach and my favorite age group is pre-k to fourth grade. I love sitting on the floor and teaching through play and just seeing the light of understanding in their eyes. I got my first teaching job while I was doing my internship at Brookhaven College. They hired me in the middle of my class and I ended up working there for two years. After graduation I got another job at Kids R Kids but was 'let go' because I supposedly did not 'fit in' with the other teachers. I knew it was simply because of the seizure I had in the classroom and now could not be left alone with the kids. That nearly destroyed my spirit and determination. I applied for another position at Primrose School and got it. Once again the seizure reared it's ugly head, not once but twice. The second time was outside in front of all the parents waiting to pick up their children. I was immediately informed that I wasn't safe for the children. I had thoughts of just curling up and letting the worst happen to me because I was officially a failure. Through it all God, my family, my indestructible mother and my husband, a gift from God, stood by me and urged me to go on. I was unemployed for three months before I started working at Lowe's and have been there for a year. I don't know what to say except that GOD IS REAL!!!!!! I don't care what people say or think it is true. I've had three seizures in the last two months alone and am still working there. On Thursday August 30th I have an appointment so see a neurologist. I cannot explain the relief for both me and my army of people. We will finally know what is causing all these problems and my husband and I will start on a whole new project. All I can ask for is more prayer because I know it works. It has till now and it will continue to work in spite of everything.